Friday, September 5, 2014

Why am I being disliked?

If you are a person wondering why you are being disliked by people around you for no valid reason, you will not be surprised to know that people may dislike you just because you failed to keep up to their expectations. Expectations can be any form- simple, intense, relational and sometimes unwarranted. However, we need to realize that we cannot meet the expectations of others fully. We do take efforts to fulfill the expectations of immediate family members. For instance, between parents and children, between spouses, etc. Yet it is difficult to fulfill all of the unspoken expectations.

If we find that people get cross with us just because we failed to keep up to their expectations, we will need to understand that we will eventually be disliked. How would we handle such situations? Most of us would answer...'I don't care for such people in my life' or even 'I don't want them'. Instead of holding such attitude, what we can do as matured adults is to allow those who dislike us ...to be what they are, feel what they want to and continue to be them. All that we can do is distance from them psychologically and give them their psychological space.

Giving psychological space to others is an important ingredient for interpersonal relationships as well as for our psychological well-being. It refers to not cribbing and complaining about people who dislike us but accept it as their innate nature and consider less of why they dislike us. This will heal our inner self as it will enable us to experience psychological freedom in unimaginable ways...